It won't write itself

I still am not quit of the humanities program.  I have one paper to write for a class I took an incomplete in. (That sentence sucks - try again) I took an "incomplete" in a class, and have one paper left to write.

After I wrote the first paper for the class, my instructor thanked me for writing a good paper.  She complained bitterly about some of the other students' writing abilities and styles.  All of my papers received positive feedback and often were top in the class.  So why...WHY...The final paper completely overwhelmed me.  I was intimidated by the length of the paper, the short time to write it, and the chance I might fail at writing it.

The funny, ironic, thing is that as the due date approached the instructor seemed to be losing her nerve as well.  She asked us to turn the papers in early if we could, in order to allow her more time to grade them.  She suggested we write shorter papers so she would have less to read.  By the end she was practically begging us to write papers less than half as long as the original assignment.

Obviously I should have just written something quickly and turned it in.  It's highly unlikely I would have received less than an "A".  Still I had already decided to take an "Incomplete" so I didn't consider her change in requirements as the opportunity it was.

Now, instead of being completely finished I'm trying to write this final paper.  And by "trying" I mean I'm blogging about it instead of actually writing it.  I've got a start.  Not a great start, but a start.  I've built it up to be so much more than it is.  I'm sure no matter what I write I'll at least get a "B".  Why not just slap it together, reread and edit, and send it off?  Why am I still overwhelmed by it?  I did a great job on all the successive papers in the classes that followed hers.

Grump.